Friday, December 17, 2010

I’m gonna make it.

I found myself in a very unusual situation today.

I am still almost pain free.

The sharp stinging that has kept me in my room for almost 4 months...

...has practically gone away. 

Disappeared.

Occasionally,  I get little reminders that grab at my insides, trying to convince me that the endo has returned. But these false alarms only last about 20 minutes or so.

Then, I am free to breathe again. 

I am free to live.

I am free to eat.
I am free to move.
I am free to sleep.
I am free to be. 

I’m gonna make it. 

I’m gonna make it.

Attacking a few bites of calamari tonight - FRIED!
(courtesy of Lupron)

I woke up early this morning, around 4 a.m., with a dry throat and a body soaked in sweat. 

It is the hot flashes that make me change my sheets  every night.

It is the nausea that always threatens to take away my breakfast. 

It is the exhaustion that tries to take over my body and thoughts.

But the pain is gone. 

I’m gonna make it. 

I jogged, walked, lifted, biked, and did whatever else I could do at the gym today. I talked, watched t.v., and stalked a few cute guys. I lived a normal day. Finally. Finally!

Then, the unplanned “situation” hit me, and I found myself trying to figure out what I was going to do on a Friday night that didn’t have me laying in bed, begging God for relief. 

I realized that I could move
I could actually do something

Is this what it feels like to be alive again? 

The feelings of being set free from pain after so many days are overwhelming. 

I keep finding myself crying and laughing (Lupron can be blamed as well for the emotions gone wild). 

I danced

And praised
Bowed down in thanks.

And prayed

I made a video for Jane this morning to one of my favorite songs. And posted it below.

Her pics are fun,
the verses are encouraging,
the lyrics of the song are priceless

But I am posting it below because it speaks to me....right here, right now.

Yes, it has been a long recover. 

It has been a long day.

A long four months of pain.

But, it’s okay

The storm was dark and harsh. 

The battle was bloody and ruthless.

The disease tore my world apart.

BUT...

I’m gonna make it. 



Check out Jane’s story if you haven’t already. She’s running the Great Wall Marathon for endometriosis awareness and research. 

3 comments:

  1. This is fantastic news, hope it keeps up for you! Cute pic :)

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  2. I love the video but more importantly I love this post! I love reading that you are feeling better and stronger!! I'm so happy for you my friend!

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  3. Thank you so much, ladies! I’m so excited to be moving around so much more now!

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